As I write this, savior of the San Francisco Giants, valiant knight of Sir Christopher Russo, and honorable servant of Genius Master Brian Sabean BARRY ZITO is in line for first win of this still young season tonight as the Giants take on the NL East leading (wait, what) Marlins tonight in Florida.
Zito, who is 0-8 with an ERA too hilarious to type, is making something like 17 million dollars this year. He also has an endorsement deal with a local manure company. How can anyone not buy his product? You got ma, which is great, and newer! Who doesn't like that?
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